Sisters’ Jihaad

When asked about women’s jihaad, many people quote the hadeeth about hajj being a woman’s jihaad, but rarely do we see the following hadeeth being quoted.

A woman came to the Prophet (saw) and said:

“O Messenger of Allaah! I come to you on behalf of a group of women. For the men is al-jihaad and the spoils of war. What is for us?”

So the Prophet (saw) said:

“Convey to those whom you meet from the women that (a) obedience to the husband and (b) respect for his status is equal to that, and how few from amongst you actually does it.”

[Al-Bazzaar & Tabaraanee]

Being An Obedient Wife

If you were to ponder you would realise that the reward for good (i.e you obeying your husband) is nothing but good (i.e, he will in return treat you good). So your obedience towards your husband leads to him being obedient to you in those things that you seek from him, because indeed a pure soul is accustomed to responding to good with good…

So it is incumbent upon you to obey your husband in al-ma’roof. And that which is apparent from the meaning of obedience is to act upon a command and to abstain from a prohibition. You should become as close to him as possible, by seeking to satisfy his wants and needs at all times.

Don’t wait for him to give you a command or to prohibit you from something.

Rather reflect on your days spent with him and on the things he loves and hates, and be quick to carry these things out. Let your actions precede his command and prohibition. For indeed this is a sign of your cleverness and dignity that you hasten towards good before he even commands it of you.

In addition to that, this obedience is something you have to be committed to and firm upon at all times. So if he were to command you with one thing or prohibit you from another thing, then do not wait for him to command you with the same thing each and every time. It is looked down upon by men of intellect that a man has to constantly reprimand his wife saying, do this and don’t do that.

If you know from your husband’s personality that he likes or dislikes a thing, don’t wait for him to command you and prohibit you, because this is from the things that lead to a husband becoming bored with his wife.

[Taken from “20 Pieces Of Advice To My Sister Before Her Marriage”, p. 26-27]

Behind Every Successful Man Is A Successful Woman

‘Ubayd Ibn Ya’eesh said:

“For thirty years I have not eaten with my own hands; my sister would feed me while I wrote down ahaadeeth!”

[Al-Jaami’ Li Akhlaaqir Raawee Wa Aadaabis Saami’, 2/178]

9 Tips On How To Be A Beautiful Wife

1) To beautify your eyes, lower your gaze towards strange men, this will make your eyes pure and shiny.

2) To beautify your face and make it shiny, keep doing wudhoo’ minimum five times a day.

3) To have attractive lips, always mention Allah and remember to speak the truth.

4) As for blush and rouge, “Modesty” (Haya) is one of the best brands and it can be found in any of the Islamic centers.

5) To remove impurities from your face and body, use a soap called “Astaghfaar” (seeking forgiveness of Allah) this soap will remove any bad deeds.

6) Now about your hair, if any of you has a problem of hair split ends, then I suggest “Islamic Hijab” which will protect your hair from damage.

7) As for jewelry, beautify your hands with humbleness and let your hands be generous and give charity to the poor.

8) To avoid heart disease, forgive people who hurt your feelings.

9) Your necklace should be a sign to pardon your fellow brothers and sisters.

If you follow these advices given to you by the Creator, you will have a beautiful inner and outer appearance.

How To Win The Love Of Your Husband

Do you know that you have the power to change the mood that your husband is in just by using what Allah has given you? The problem is that as women, we are often too proud, or stubborn to give in. But this is to our own detriment.

If your husband comes home tired and cranky, greet him with a loving smile. Bring the best out in yourself and in your appearance, wearing what pleases his eyes, and applying perfume, have your house looking clean and smelling nice.

Make your home a haven for your husband. Serve him his favourite food and drink.

Make physical contact with him (unfortunately many women forget this power Allaah has given them), just by that soft touch and sweet look, you can cause all his worries and stress to fall out of his mind.

This is sure to make him relax and let go of all the stress of the day.

Even though he may not know how to show his appreciation, know that you have eased him of his burdens and helped him to feel loved and honored.

This will free up his mind and ease his heart so that he can be more present with you and your children.

He will have a deep sense of contentment and insha’Allah he will implement the advice given above. And remember the reward: The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wasalaam) said:

‘If you (women) observe the salat, fast the month of Ramadhan, pay zakaat, obey your husbands and guard your chastity, you will be asked to enter Jannah through any gate.’

Being A Mujaahid’s Wife

[Written by a Mujaahid’s Wife. A long read, but well worth it. Excuse the poor translation as I’m assuming it was done by a Urdu speaker who has English as a second language, rather than an English speaker who has Urdu as a second language, hence why there are some grammatical errors throughout the document, but nothing major inshaaAllaah. 

Note; This is in no way encouraging extremism or terrorism in any form, as Islaam is against all forms of violence, as can be seen in this post.]

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Compassionate!

Praise be to Allah, Lord of the worlds, peace and blessings be upon the best creation of Allah, his family and companions. And then:

Yes, Jihad is a men’s privilege but behind every mujahid there are women: his mother, grandmothers, sisters, wives etc, who took part in his journey. And frequently it is the wife that understands and supports her husband in his choice, and who shoulders part of privation and hardships of Jihad.

It is hard to overestimate the importance that a husband plays in every woman’s life, just consider how Allah, Great and Glorious He is, created Hava, and realize that it is not easy for a rib to be without the body, while the body can do without the rib. In this essay I would like to talk about our sisters that provide a reliable rear to our brothers-mujahideen.

Here came that day when your husband embarked on Allah’s path. How much he dreamed or you both dreamed, how much did he prepare for it, sitting literally “on suitcases” (on a rucksack to be more precise), and you aspired to this great favor and blessing, recognizing that award for that would be very great. And the door closed after him, and you are left alone in your house where so recently together you happily dreamed and contemplated about the future. From this moment on your are not just the wife of a good Muslim, your are the wife of a mujahid!

Your heart is filled with joy, pride for your husband, bitterness and pain of partying. You feel in heart emptiness, tears fill your eyes, but you say to yourself: “Be patient, the servant of Allah! Is not that what you wanted? Is not that what you dreamed of? Take pride, your husband is not the slave of Dinar, not a coward nor is he a traitor, he is one of the best on Earth, he is a mujahid on the way to Allah!“

Seven Beautiful Pearls Which Make A Wife Special

1) The Patient:

The woman who remains patient in all circumstances, and never whines, moans, nags or complains. When some trouble or affliction hits her, she turns to Allah for help.

2) The Protector:

The woman who protects her husband’s wealth & her chastity when he is away from home. She doesn’t gossip or mingle with other men, nor does she allow anyone in his house without his approval. She knows, respects and stays within the boundaries of his gheerah.

When he returns, she runs to his arms, as if she was anticipating for his return. She allows him time to relax before anything and does not burden him with the day’s problems, but listens attentively to his needs and does her best to take his tiredness away.

3) The Lover:

The women who adores her husband, beautifies herself, and smells nice for him. She craves for his children to the extent that whenever her husband glances at her, du’aa pours for her from the bottom of his heart. She is characterised with shyness and modesty, glancing with love in her eyes, only for her husband.

Advice Of ‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far To His Daughter Before Her Marriage

‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far (may Allah have mercy on him) addressed his daughter saying:

(1) Avoid jealousy, as it is the key to your divorce;

(2) Avoid complaint, as it instigates anger;

(3) Adorn yourself for him, and make sure you wash away any bad odours by frequent bathing.

Some Advice To The Muslim Women, By Khaalid Yaseen [VDO]

Click here to download the lecture [external link].

This lecture is a vital one to watch, for both sisters and brothers. Shaykh Khalid Yasin goes through many important topics, such as the rights and responsibilities of the wife to husband and vice-versa, the controversial issue of polygamy (multiple marriage) – the wisdom and legitimacy behind it and much more. The Shaykh also gives lots of advice for a successful and happy marriage.

I have uploaded this lecture on my account on IslamicTube. Below are the links to the parts in shaa allaah:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8  | Part 9.

O Sisters, Your Brother-In-Law Is Nothing But Death!

The Hadeeth:

A wife should not go out in front of the brother-in-law or be alone with him in the house, because the Prophet (saw) said:

“Beware of entering upon women.“

One of the Sahaabah said to him, “O Messenger of Allaah, what about the brother-in-law?“

He said: “The brother-in-law is death!“

[Bukhaaree, Fath al-Baari, 9/330]

Commentry By An-Nawawee:

An-Nawawee, may Allaah have mercy on him, said:

This hadeeth refers to all the relatives of the husband apart from his father and sons, who are mahrams for the wife and she is allowed to be alone with them; they are not described as “death.” It refers to the brother, nephew, uncle, cousin and other relatives of the husband whom she would be permitted to marry if she were not already married.

Because people customarily treat this matter so lightly, and a man may sit alone with his brother’s wife, the brother-in-law is likened to death, and he is the foremost among non-mahram men who should be prevented from doing so.