Tag Archive | husband

Being An Obedient Wife

If you were to ponder you would realise that the reward for good (i.e you obeying your husband) is nothing but good (i.e, he will in return treat you good). So your obedience towards your husband leads to him being obedient to you in those things that you seek from him, because indeed a pure soul is accustomed to responding to good with good…

So it is incumbent upon you to obey your husband in al-ma’roof. And that which is apparent from the meaning of obedience is to act upon a command and to abstain from a prohibition. You should become as close to him as possible, by seeking to satisfy his wants and needs at all times.

Don’t wait for him to give you a command or to prohibit you from something.

Rather reflect on your days spent with him and on the things he loves and hates, and be quick to carry these things out. Let your actions precede his command and prohibition. For indeed this is a sign of your cleverness and dignity that you hasten towards good before he even commands it of you.

In addition to that, this obedience is something you have to be committed to and firm upon at all times. So if he were to command you with one thing or prohibit you from another thing, then do not wait for him to command you with the same thing each and every time. It is looked down upon by men of intellect that a man has to constantly reprimand his wife saying, do this and don’t do that.

If you know from your husband’s personality that he likes or dislikes a thing, don’t wait for him to command you and prohibit you, because this is from the things that lead to a husband becoming bored with his wife.

[Taken from “20 Pieces Of Advice To My Sister Before Her Marriage”, p. 26-27]

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Six Narrations For Every Pious Wife

Narration 1)

The Prophet (saw) said: “It is not allowed for a woman to fast in the presence of her husband except with his permission except for Ramadhaan. And she may admit no one to his house except with his permission.” [Bukhaaree & others]

Narration 2)

The Prophet (saw) said: ”Whenever a man calls his wife to their bed but he refuses to come, letting him spend the night angry with her, she is cursed by the angels until morning.

In another narration: “… until she relents (i.e. goes to him).“ In yet another narration: “… until he forgives her.” [Bukhaaree, Muslim and others]

Narration 3)

The Prophet (saw) said: ”By the One in whose Hand is the soul of Muhammad, no woman has fulfilled her obligations to her Lord until she has fulfilled her obligations to her husband – even if he were to ask for herself when she is mounted in the saddle, she would not refuse his request.” [Ibn Maajah, Ahmad and others: Saheeh]

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How To Win The Love Of Your Husband

Do you know that you have the power to change the mood that your husband is in just by using what Allah has given you? The problem is that as women, we are often too proud, or stubborn to give in. But this is to our own detriment.

If your husband comes home tired and cranky, greet him with a loving smile. Bring the best out in yourself and in your appearance, wearing what pleases his eyes, and applying perfume, have your house looking clean and smelling nice.

Make your home a haven for your husband. Serve him his favourite food and drink.

Make physical contact with him (unfortunately many women forget this power Allaah has given them), just by that soft touch and sweet look, you can cause all his worries and stress to fall out of his mind.

This is sure to make him relax and let go of all the stress of the day.

Even though he may not know how to show his appreciation, know that you have eased him of his burdens and helped him to feel loved and honored.

This will free up his mind and ease his heart so that he can be more present with you and your children.

He will have a deep sense of contentment and insha’Allah he will implement the advice given above. And remember the reward: The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wasalaam) said:

If you (women) observe the salat, fast the month of Ramadhan, pay zakaat, obey your husbands and guard your chastity, you will be asked to enter Jannah through any gate.

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Some Advice To The Muslim Women, By Khaalid Yaseen [VDO]

Click here to download the lecture [external link].

This lecture is a vital one to watch, for both sisters and brothers. Shaykh Khalid Yasin goes through many important topics, such as the rights and responsibilities of the wife to husband and vice-versa, the controversial issue of polygamy (multiple marriage) – the wisdom and legitimacy behind it and much more. The Shaykh also gives lots of advice for a successful and happy marriage.

I have uploaded this lecture on my account on IslamicTube. Below are the links to the parts in shaa allaah:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8  | Part 9.

Why Is It People Judge Muslim Women Differently

Just a few things to think about:

Why is it when a woman serves her boss at work she is honored, but when she serves her husband (her closest companion in life) it is considered slavery?

Why is it when a woman teaches other kids at school, she is great and is needed to produce an educated society, but when she stays at home to teach her kids and raises them, she is not so great, and should do something more productive in life than just lay eggs and raise kids?!!!

Why is it when a woman works as a chef and serves food for other people, she is praised, or is not looked down upon, but when she stays at home and cooks for her family, she is oppressed or backwards?

Why is it when a woman works at a dry cleaner, cleaning other peoples clothes, she is doing fine, she is working to earn money, nothing wrong with that, but when she washes her husband’s and childrens clothes, she is suffering and needs to be saved?!

Why is it when a woman works in an office outside of her home, she is a great woman, but if she works in an office inside of her home, she is not so great, and the only difference is that the second is at home ?

Why is it when a woman stays at home to serve her family she is a slave that needs to be freed from her prison, is oppressed, unproductive, backwards, and needs to get a life, while the woman who serves other people outside of her home, is a great and magnificent woman, she is a free woman, an equal to man, and has a bright future.

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Wives Preventing Polygyny, By Shaykh Al-Albaanee

Definition: Polygyny: The condition or practice of having more than one wife at one time.

This is a much needed admonition to the muslimaat upon the sunnah, and may Allaah grant both men and women the akhlaaq (manners) to deal with such situations.

Shaykh Al-Albaanee (rahimahullaah) says:

Of course, I believe that that is not allowed for (the woman) (to come between her husband and polygyny) because of two reasons:

The first (reason) is that she is hindering (her husband) from the path of Allaah.

And the other (reason) is that she is opposing the command of her husband.

Because you know…that the obedience of a woman to her husband is obligatory the way the matter is with regard to the obedience of an individual from the individual members of a nation toward the Muslim ruler, with an obedience which I don’t say is blind but rather a complete obedience, except what is made an exception in the islamic legislation, which is (obeying someone) in disobedience to Allaah.

And from this results Islamically legislated rulings which (state) that if the Muslim ruler commands that which is fundamentally allowed, this command becomes obligatory for the one who is commanded with it to carry it out, because it is the command of the ruler. Exactly likewise is the command with respect to the husband with his wife.

So, if the husband commands his wife with some command while that command is allowed in the foundation of the islamic legislation and while the woman is able to carry it out, then it is obligatory upon her to obey him. And if she does not obey him, then she has disobeyed Allaah and His Messenger [sallAllaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam].

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