He Told Her A Lie About His Parents And She Is Asking Him For Khula‘
QUESTION: If a man tells a lie to his wife, is that a valid reason for her to ask for khula‘? I lied to my wife before we got married by telling her that my parents were dead, when that was not the case.
ANSWER: Praise be to Allaah.
There is no doubt that lying is one of the vilest of attributes and it is the key to all evil and is a weak foundation for the one who wants to build a household and establish a Muslim family.
It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allah ibn Mas‘ood (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I enjoin you to be truthful, for truthfulness leads to righteousness and righteousness leads to Paradise. A man may continue to tell the truth and endeavour to be truthful until he is recorded with Allaah as a speaker of truth. And beware of lying, for lying leads to wickedness and wickedness leads to Hell. A man may continue to tell lies and endeavour to tell lies, until he is recorded with Allaah as a liar.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (6094) and Muslim (2607).
But that mistake that the husband made on its own is not a justification or sufficient reason for the woman to try to break up her family by seeking divorce (talaaq) or khula‘, if there is no convincing legitimate shar‘i, rational, health or social reason for that, so long as the wife cannot see any fault in her husband’s attitude or religious commitment or his treatment of her. There may have been a reason why he committed this error. What he should do now is admit his mistake and admit that his deed was serious and wrong.
If he sets things straight with his wife and is good in his religious commitment and his treatment of her, then the wife should not take that as an excuse to break up her family, especially as she has nothing to gain from his parents being dead and will not be harmed if they are alive. All there is to be said is that she does not have to live with them or live in their house, and the matter is settled.
QUESTION: Some people started believing in what the media of the enemies try to spread, which is an intellectual planned invasion. Like when they say: “ Islam is unjust to women, Islam has kept women at their homes and thus kept half of the society unemployed”. What is your answer and comment on this lie?.
ANSWER: (By Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen (r.a))
Praise be to Allaah.
My comment on this is that these words can only come from one who is ignorant of sharee’ah, ignorant of Islam, ignorant of the rights of women, and is impressed by the attitudes and ways of the enemies of Allaah who are far away from the truth. Islam – praise be to Allaah – did not take away women’s rights, but Islam is the religion of wisdom which gives everyone his or her rightful status. Women’s work is in the home, and her staying athome is for the purpose of looking after her husband, raising her children, taking care the household affairs, and doing work that is suited to her.
The man has his own work to do, which is usually earning a living and benefiting the ummah. When she stays at home to look after him and her children, and the interests of her children, that is the work that is suited to her. It is also a protection for her, as it keeps her far away from immorality which may occur if she goes out and works with men. It is well known that when women work with men that also adversely affects the man’s work, because the man has a natural inclination towards women. If he works with her he will be distracted by this woman, especially if she is young and beautiful. He will forget his work and if he does it, he will not do it properly. The one who studies the situation of the Muslims at the beginning of Islam will see how they protected their womenfolk and how they did their work in the best manner. [End quote].
[Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Uthaymeen. Alfaaz wa Mafaaheem fi Meezaan al-Sharee’ah, p.72-73.]