Tag Archive | children

Advice To Women Regarding Marriage: The Wife’s Role In Her Home

Advice To Women Regarding Marriage: The Wife’s Role In Her Home

This is to serve her husband, bear, nurse, and nurture his children, and be a housewife.

If a woman is used to being immersed in the study and propagation of Islaam, and then marries whilst not clearly having in mind a role as a wife, she may begin feeling, very shortly after marriage, that her new role as a wife is a trivial one. This may cause her to begin leaving her house to resume her former lifestyle. It is vital, however, that she understand her role and obligation as a wife and the reward of fulfilling them. Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “If a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month (i.e. the month of Ramadhaan), guards her private parts and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any of its gates that she wishes.” [Abu Nu’aym]

The married woman must persevere through the hardships of pregnancy, pre-delivery contractions and the agony of the delivery itself. Some women refuse to go through such hardships and take birth control pills to prevent pregnancy, or, if they do get pregnant, prefer a caesarean section over a normal delivery.

‘Amr Ibn Hijr (may Allah have mercy on him) married Kindah Bint ‘Awf Ash-Shaybaani (may Allah have mercy on him). On her wedding night, her mother, Umaamah Bint Al-Haarith (may Allah be pleased with her) took her aside and advised her:

Dear daughter! You are leaving the environment which you are accustomed to and departing from the place you grew up in to a partner whom you are unfamiliar with. If a woman had no need of a husband due to her parents sufficing her, then you would be the last person to require a husband, but women were created to be the partners of men, and men were created to be the partners of women. Act like his slave, and he will become like your slave. Uphold the following ten matters and you will find them to be provisions:

– The first and second are to be content with what he provides and to listen to and obey him.

– The third and the fourth are to make sure that all he sees and smells from you are pleasing to him, so he should not see you in a displeasing appearance, nor smell anything but a fine fragrance from you.

– The fifth and the sixth are to comfort him in his sleep and food, because repeated hunger and lack of sleep will enflame his anger.

– The seventh and the eighth are to protect his wealth and take care of his children; the focal point regarding wealth is to have good judgement in spending it, and that regarding the children is to properly nurture them.

– The ninth and the tenth are to not disobey his commands or disclose his secrets, because when you disobey him you intimidate him, and if you disclose his secrets you would not know what he may do to you. Do not be joyful in front of him when he is upset, or express sadness if he is happy.”

‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far (may Allah have mercy on him) addressed his daughter saying:

“- Avoid jealousy, as it is the key to your divorce;

– avoid complaint, as it instigates anger;

– adorn yourself for him, and make sure you wash away any bad odours by frequent bathing.

Source

Is Islam Unjust To Women By Keeping Them Indoors!?

QUESTION: Some people started believing in what the media of the enemies try to spread, which is an intellectual planned invasion. Like when they say: “ Islam is unjust to women, Islam has kept women at their homes and thus kept half of the society unemployed”. What is your answer and comment on this lie?.

ANSWER: (By Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen (r.a))

Praise be to Allaah.

My comment on this is that these words can only come from one who is ignorant of sharee’ah, ignorant of Islam, ignorant of the rights of women, and is impressed by the attitudes and ways of the enemies of Allaah who are far away from the truth. Islam – praise be to Allaah – did not take away women’s rights, but Islam is the religion of wisdom which gives everyone his or her rightful status. Women’s work is in the home, and her staying athome is for the purpose of looking after her husband, raising her children, taking care the household affairs, and doing work that is suited to her.

The man has his own work to do, which is usually earning a living and benefiting the ummah. When she stays at home to look after him and her children, and the interests of her children, that is the work that is suited to her. It is also a protection for her, as it keeps her far away from immorality which may occur if she goes out and works with men. It is well known that when women work with men that also adversely affects the man’s work, because the man has a natural inclination towards women. If he works with her he will be distracted by this woman, especially if she is young and beautiful. He will forget his work and if he does it, he will not do it properly. The one who studies the situation of the Muslims at the beginning of Islam will see how they protected their womenfolk and how they did their work in the best manner. [End quote].

[Shaykh Muhammad ibn ‘Uthaymeen. Alfaaz wa Mafaaheem fi Meezaan al-Sharee’ah, p.72-73.]

Source: IslamQA

They Are Clothing For You And You Are Clothing For Them

Great Tafsir of one ayat in Qur’an. So many benefits arranged from one sentence of Qur’an.

Allah says: “It is made lawful for you to have sexual relations with your wives on the on the night of the fasts. They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them…” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 187]

Allah chose to use the word “clothing” rather than any other word to describe the special relationship between a man and his wife. Allah made the man clothing for the woman and the woman clothing for the man. The word “clothing” as used in this context is rich with meaning. It would be quite difficult to express in words every subtlety that it conveys. We shall try, however, to consider a few of the ideas that this word expresses.

1. The word “clothing” in its most literal sense is what immediately covers the body with no barrier in between.

2. The word clothing connotes the idea of equality, complementarity, and support of both a psychological and physical nature. The man has his role and the woman has hers. The woman cannot be construed as merely a vehicle to fulfill the man’s desires. She is a human being, equal to the man. Each of them is as clothing to the other in every aspect of life.

3. Clothing implies adornment and beautification. Allah says: “Take your adornment to every mosque.” [Sûrah al-A`raf: 31] A man and woman are an adornment and beautification for each other.

Ibn `Abbâs said: “Indeed, I like to dress up for a woman in the same way as I like it for a woman to dress herself up for me. This is because Allah says: ‘And they have upon you similar rights to those you have upon them in good dealings.’ And I do not like to exact from her every right to which I am entitled, since Allah says: ‘and for the man there is a degree over them’.” [Tafsîr al-Tabarî (1/625)]

Some of this beauty is of a physical kind, for a person sees in the one he truly loves beauty that others do not see.

Some of this beauty is also of an intangible nature. Faithfulness and enduring friendship are a part of faith, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) said.

A woman adorns herself with her husband when she speaks about him to her friends. She can tend to embellish her account, claiming that he loves her so much, honors her so much, and gives her so much… even when the truth is far short of all that.

4. Clothing conveys the meaning of covering and concealment. Allah says: “O children of Adam! We have bestowed upon you clothing to conceal your shame and as an adornment.” [Sûrah al-A`râf: 26]

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