Tag Archive | child

Every Mother Is A Da’ee, By Ibn ‘Uthaymeen

A woman first and foremost needs to be righteous herself, so that she can be a good example for her daughters…

A woman should train her children properly, for her children represent the men and women of the future. In the earliest stages of their development, it is the mothers that human beings learn from. If she is a good mother, good in her manners and dealings and good in the way she brings up her children, then those children will take after her and contribute positively to the betterment of society.

Every mother, then, must dedicate herself to training her children, and if she cannot undertake their training on her own, then their father or another guardian – for example, a brother or uncle, if their father is dead – should help her to raise them.

A woman should not yield to difficult circumstances, feeling that she cannot change her situation or her family’s situation for the better.

[The Islaamic Awakening, by Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, Pp. 223 & 229]

Naming Children

Due to Az-Zubayr’s deep love of martyrdom, he named his sons after martyred Companions.

Hishaam Ibn ‘Urwah narrated that his father said that Az-Zubayr said:

Talhah named his sons after Prophets when he learned that there would be no Prophet after Muhammad (saw). But I named my children after martyrs, in the hope that they will attain martyrdom:

Abdullah after Abdullah Ibn Jahsh, Al-Mundhir after Al-Mundhir Ibn ‘Amr, ‘Urwah after ‘Urwah Ibn Mas’ood, Hamzah after Hamzah, Ja’far after Ja’far Ibn Abee Taalib, Mus’ab after Mus’ab Ibn ‘Umayr, ‘Ubaydah after ‘Ubaydah ibn al-Haarith, Khaalid after Khaalid Ibn Sa’eed and ‘Amr after ‘Amr Ibn Sa’eed Ibn Al-’Aas, who was killed at Yarmook.

[At-Tabaqaat, 3/101]

22 Tips For Parents

What does it take for parents to get a teen to become a practicing Muslim?

Sound Vision has talked to parents, Imams, activists and Muslims who have grown up in the West to ask what are some practical things parents can do to help Muslim teens maintain their Deen. These are some of their suggestions:

Tip #1: Take parenting more seriously than you would a full-time job

This means both parents must understand their children are a trust from Allah, and He will ask how they were raised. If the children do not grow up practicing Islam because of their parents’ negligence, it is not going to be pretty in this life or the next.

Tip #2:Reduce or change work hours and exchange them for time with the family

It is better to have one full-time job, fewer luxuries in the house (i.e. more cars, expensive clothes, a bigger, fancier home) and more time with the family, than many material things and absent parents. This goes for mothers AND fathers. Parents can’t instill values in their children if they just aren’t there, period. Quit that extra job on the weekends or in the evenings and instead drive the kids to the mosque for Halaqas and activities instead. Or consider switching shifts at work so that you’re home when the kids are.

Tip #3: Read the Quran, understanding its meaning, for five minutes every day

Just five minutes. Whether it’s in the car during a traffic jam, early morning after Fajr, or right before you go to bed, read the Quran with a translation and/or Tafseer. Then watch the snowball effect. You will, Insha Allah, reconnect with Allah, and in the long run, develop into a role model helping your whole family, not just your teen, reconnect with Him too.

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Do Parents Have A Right To Choose Their Child’s Marriage Partner?

Praise be to Allaah.

The basic principle is that one of the conditions of marriage is the consent of both parties, because of the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) which says that the Prophet SAW said: “A virgin cannot be married until her consent has been sought and a previously-married woman cannot be married until she has been consulted.” They said, “O Messenger of Allaah, what is her consent?” He said, “If she remains silent.” [Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5136; Muslim, 1419]

Consent is essential in the case of the husband, and also in the case of the wife. The parents have no right to force their son or their daughter to marry someone they do not want.

But if the person whom the parents have chosen is righteous, then the child, whether male or female, should obey the parents in that, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry (your daughter) to him.” [Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1084; Ibn Maajah, 1967. Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 865]

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Advice To Women Regarding Marriage: The Wife’s Role In Her Home

Advice To Women Regarding Marriage: The Wife’s Role In Her Home

This is to serve her husband, bear, nurse, and nurture his children, and be a housewife.

If a woman is used to being immersed in the study and propagation of Islaam, and then marries whilst not clearly having in mind a role as a wife, she may begin feeling, very shortly after marriage, that her new role as a wife is a trivial one. This may cause her to begin leaving her house to resume her former lifestyle. It is vital, however, that she understand her role and obligation as a wife and the reward of fulfilling them. Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “If a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month (i.e. the month of Ramadhaan), guards her private parts and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any of its gates that she wishes.” [Abu Nu’aym]

The married woman must persevere through the hardships of pregnancy, pre-delivery contractions and the agony of the delivery itself. Some women refuse to go through such hardships and take birth control pills to prevent pregnancy, or, if they do get pregnant, prefer a caesarean section over a normal delivery.

‘Amr Ibn Hijr (may Allah have mercy on him) married Kindah Bint ‘Awf Ash-Shaybaani (may Allah have mercy on him). On her wedding night, her mother, Umaamah Bint Al-Haarith (may Allah be pleased with her) took her aside and advised her:

Dear daughter! You are leaving the environment which you are accustomed to and departing from the place you grew up in to a partner whom you are unfamiliar with. If a woman had no need of a husband due to her parents sufficing her, then you would be the last person to require a husband, but women were created to be the partners of men, and men were created to be the partners of women. Act like his slave, and he will become like your slave. Uphold the following ten matters and you will find them to be provisions:

– The first and second are to be content with what he provides and to listen to and obey him.

– The third and the fourth are to make sure that all he sees and smells from you are pleasing to him, so he should not see you in a displeasing appearance, nor smell anything but a fine fragrance from you.

– The fifth and the sixth are to comfort him in his sleep and food, because repeated hunger and lack of sleep will enflame his anger.

– The seventh and the eighth are to protect his wealth and take care of his children; the focal point regarding wealth is to have good judgement in spending it, and that regarding the children is to properly nurture them.

– The ninth and the tenth are to not disobey his commands or disclose his secrets, because when you disobey him you intimidate him, and if you disclose his secrets you would not know what he may do to you. Do not be joyful in front of him when he is upset, or express sadness if he is happy.”

‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far (may Allah have mercy on him) addressed his daughter saying:

“- Avoid jealousy, as it is the key to your divorce;

– avoid complaint, as it instigates anger;

– adorn yourself for him, and make sure you wash away any bad odours by frequent bathing.

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