The Communication Between Men & Women Over the Internet

The Communication Between Men & Women Over the Internet

Compiled by: Abu Ziead al-Athary

Assalamu alaykum wa Rahmatullaahi wa Barakatuhu

The noble Shaykh Ubayd al-Jabari ý may Allaah protect him- repeats his warning against communication, with mobile phones or over the internet, between men and women while claiming the justification of seeking knowledge or giving Dawaý.

In an open question and answer session taking place every Sunday evening in the Paltalk room ýSalafi Duroosý, the noble Shaykh said: ýCommunicating over the telephone is an area and way in which the heart of both the speaker and communicator will become attached to the otherýs!ý
Here is a transcript of what the Shaykh commented on after an answer to a similar question:

ýI would like to bring to attention a dangerous issueý. Which many of the Muslim men and women who they ascribe themselves to knowledge fall into. I have dealt with this issue before but many of the people have refused it and that they have been obstinate and rejected the advice!!

From the news that has reached me of the danger of this issue, a person finds it embarrassing to mention itý. And this is the issue, which is individuals speaking over the phone and communicating via mobile phones.

This matter has overcome many men and women with the justification of Dawaý but this justification is not valid and it is an excuse which is corrupt. It is not hidden from every Muslim man and woman whose heart has been filled with the awe and reverential fear of Allaah, that al-Khallwaa (being alone with a member of the opposite sex with whom there is no relation) is Haraam. The meaning here is that khallwaa is being alone with strange men and women.

As for the evil effects of this, as have been relayed to me, they are more severe than al-Khallwaa (being alone with a member of the opposite sex with whom there is no relation), since al-Khallwaa in a house or in a car causes the people to look at them, as for communicating over the internet and sending and receiving messages over the phone then this is a hidden Khallwaa, which is only known to the Originator of the heavens and the earth and the noble scribes (Angels).

Indeed many women have complained that what has busied their husbands are these conversations and communication and I will mention some of their evil effects for you:

Firstly: if these communications are taking place in a chat room, for example in ýSalafi Duroosý so I say in the name of those supervising ýSalafi Duroosý ýthis type of chatting is a sin upon youý this type of chatting is a sin upon you ý I do not hold it to be permissibleý I say this because I supervise ýSalafi Duroosý so I speak with the ruling of a representative.

Secondly: Chatting like this busies one from learning knowledge, since those who isolate themselves by conversing with whatever they want from conversation, then they busy themselves away from what is transmitted by ýSalafi Duroosý and from other knowledge-based lessons and this is obstruction in the path of Allaah.

Thirdly: Communicating over the telephone is an area and way in which the heart of both the speaker and communicator will become attached to the otherýs! And this is ý I swear by Allaah ý the path of Fitnah and an entrance for shaytaan. It is not permissible for you, O dear Muslim sister, that you spend your time conversing with strangers with the justification of Dawaý. If you have the pressing need to ask a question then ask the people of knowledge to the extent of your need and then turn away.

Further, this communication has in it greetings and gentle speech which is a type of submissive speech which has been prohibited, O Muslim sister. As a result, perhaps you might be a cause of what creeps in between married couples of unrest, quarrels and bad relations between them, the result of which could perhaps be divorce.

I have come to know that in the West and perhaps also in the East, that which is hated has occurred due to this communication and conversing. This is why I call every Salafi man and woman to leave this terrible action which Shaytaan has opened up to them and beautified in their hearts, using the justification of knowledge and spreading of knowledge and Dawaý. It was not from the practice of the Salaf that men and women would meet up to study together, but rather a woman would ask a scholar about what a woman needs in her Deen. Also, if a female scholar was found then she would sit and listen to the men and women who came to her and would speak to the men in the presence of her guardian from behind a screen.

This is what I wanted to bring to (your) attention and Allaah knows I did not intend anything but advice and I hold that this advice to you is an obligation upon us, O dear Muslims. Allaah is The One Who guides to the correct way.ý

We say JazakAllaahu Khairan O our Shaykh for this fine advice and we ask Allaah -Subhana wa Taýala- that He grants us and all our brothers and sisters the ability to follow the advice of the Shaykh, which he always repeats in his gatherings.

We also advise the brothers and sisters that when the lessons begin, whether they are live or recorded, that they should not busy themselves with talking on the side. We ý and all praise belongs to Allaah ý sacrifice time, effort and wealth for these lessons, to transmit them to you while you are in your homes or offices, so then it saddens us to know that some people attend with their nicknames only, while they are busy chatting on the side – which has no benefit – and Allaahýs aid is sought.

We ask Allaah -Subhana wa Taýala – that He grants us awe and reverential fear of Him in secret and in open and that He grants us sincerity in all our actions, Allaah is The Guide to the correct way.

Your Brother
Abu Ziead al-Athary


2 thoughts on “The Communication Between Men & Women Over the Internet

  1. Assalamualaykum

    I am wanting to know if its okay in islam for a single men or even married men to look for a woman to marry over the internet communication is allowed or not . especially regarding the marriage website as these have pictures of women and also they have a way of communting through email and because i thought that the presence of mehram is important to be there ,there for the men and women cant talk unless someone is at presence but on these sites the men and wome keep emailing eachother to get to know better …now iss this allowed …please if someone has any quotes from the quran or any other evidence from the hadith than plz do reply to my question

    jazak allah

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